I was watching T.V, well, flicking between some "erotic movie" on Channel 4 and some stand up comedy thing on ITV. As any healthy teen boy would, being the only one awake in the house, I had the volume low, so as not to disturb my family. I also had my cock out. Unsurprisingly I was rock hard. But what got me turned on and most excited of all was something Frank Skinner said in a joke. He was talking about young guys who enjoyed a wank with a finger up their bums. Now I was so horny I just had to see how good it felt. I just couldn't relax enough to really do it but because of the naughtiness of it all I still came, rubbing my ass with one hand, the other on my cock. Still feeling horny and still hard, yes a typical teen boy, I had an urge I had never even contemplated. I scooped up some of my cum and whilst sitting back in the chair, I started to rub my own cum around my ass. This had my dick twitching with pleasure. I eventually used enough cum as a sort of lubricant and feeling. . Staten Island.” Long pause, “Dubuque.”“You?”“No, but I ain’t claiming Chicago facts without what being there. Chicago.”“My Way” seemed on permanent rotation. It used to be that way in a lot of neighborhood bars. But that demographic was ... well all demographics were, now that I thought about it.Two gents to my right were arguing about Bond girls. Bond, James Bond. Number One said, “Ask Marge, she was practically a Bond girl.”“Marge? You nuts?”“Her cousin’s neighbor saw that Bond girl in Dr. Now.”Number Two, “Now? It’s Dr. Know, like he knows everything.”This called for binding arbitration. Number One, “Hey Marge!”The one other lady in Frenchy’s said, “Yeah?” She took a large sip of schnapps.“Who was that girl, that Bond girl in Dr. Now?”“Shirley Trout. You know, the one that sang “Downtown.”Number Two used his finger to make a circle around his ear. Marge’s lost it. He whispered, “It’s Shirley Tuna.”Bar culture.I left my change — $14.25 for the house. Thought about buying a round,.
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